What do you fill the hole with? That hole in your heart where there used to be life.
Reading together, camping trips, shopping adventures, holiday decorating, all hands on deck in the kitchen. Gone.
Staid is the societal expectation. Emotion upsets the artificially calm atmosphere. Not welcome. Still empty.
The days go by as will the years in turn. But in that moment when that darkness blooms, and it will, your knees hit the floor, your hands clutch your chest, you can’t breathe without sobbing.
You cannot deny the gaping wound her death left in your heart. Torn asunder, ragged…
Sarah had suffered with mental illness since her early teens, but it’s hard to know at that age, it could be just living through that freaking awkward stage of life. She tried everything in the book and a few things that specifically weren’t in the book! She couldn’t manage her emotion, and her body wasn’t cooperating, either.
Then we took her to Medical Health Professionals. Initially this gave us hope, but the number and variety of truly dangerous drugs that they pushed onto her frequently had side effects worse than the illness.
Sarah had a serious psychotic break that was…
As a child, leaving meant a journey
Sometimes cross-country, other times overseas
Grew accustomed to moving; at first it hurt
We lived in each country for one year
Packing became just another seasonal activity
Saying goodbye, sincere promises of missives
Became a meaningless ritual with best intentions
Forced to return “home” upon my father’s death
The last time I saw him he was leaving to go to the rig
He kissed me on the head, “I love you,” I said
Never saw him again.
Casket sealed, flown to the States
Mom and I planned to shield my baby brother
Constructive Criticism: Really?!
How to Survive & Thrive in a Writing Community
By Lezlie Christian
The new platform Fellowship Writers promises to offer all writers the opportunity to receive substantive feedback on their writing, regardless their level.
This is one of the most effective ways to improve your writing. …
I just read a very well-written article about a couple gaining fame and fortune by becoming “influencers.” Following influencers isn’t something that I’m particularly keen on. I believe that everyone deserves a decent life, even unexpected or unwanted children.
10 years in the public school system has given me more insight into the issues that young people face. I would like to tell you about one student who I hope is alive.
Let’s call her Dolores. Dolor in Spanish means pain. I’ve never seen a young person holding onto so much pain, weighted down by sorrow.
Dolores took every class…
By Lezlie Christian — BYOB 2020
August 1, 2020 Internal Pain
Today was a bad day. Sometimes it seems like there is nothing you can do to pull yourself out of your self-loathing funk; even if there were, you feel so worthless you cannot muster strength or health to do your tai qi. Instead you fritter away the hours chasing down wispy trails looking for what, only the gods know. …
I recently became a lifetime member of the “I’ve lost a child club.”
Wasn’t planning on joining. Didn’t receive a flyer in the mail inviting me. It was a surprise.
My child left in September yet now it’s July and I feel frozen in time. Haven’t yet mastered the past tense.
Unbalanced is my new normal. I’ve lost my bookends, my mother and my daughter.
Now I’m just killin' time.
Just laying things out. I am a bitch of the first order. And I know how to use rhetoric. This combination has not worked out so well thus far. But I’m not wrong and I won’t be bullied.
This post is one of loss, sorrow, and anger. Pain beyond expressing.
Primal, guttural growls issued from my mouth. I was alone. This is how I grieve over the loss of a beautiful young woman, my only child, who was trapped in her apartment by an arsonist’s cruel yet impersonal fire. …
Investigator, English/Writing Teacher/Tutor, Master's in Professional Writing, Copy Editing, Gardener. Choy Li Fut. Hiker.